Biking in Mundali

Dear readers,
2 weeks duration is a good indicator of deciding the fortune of a Hindi movie.In this period, producer gets to know whether his movie has crossed 100-crore benchmark or not ? This has become quite a rage these days...nearly all bakwas masala movies  which intend to give competition to fighting skills of Rajnikant  achieves this milestone.

 When hero walks, the ground beneath his legs does the bhangra...when he hits a villain he goes on a round trip around planet earth like ISRO satellites and comes back within few seconds to be hit again by hero in a different pose..the drill gets repeated several times till the viewer decides to go out for some fresh air inside theatre Urinal. Doesn't matter whether the hero is Salman, Akshay or Ajay...all follow the same drill in between romancing a teenage heroine.

I do not understand why this trend of Mature hero and young /vivacious teen just out of school is spreading like a wildfire. Can you recall......how many  such couples you know in real life..how can anyone tolerate the bonding between 45-year young males and 16-year young girls...but this has become the magic formula of success in our movies.

May be I am being mean..but digesting love between Freudian relationship is  not my cup of tea. Kajal in Singham could have played the role of Ajay Devgan's daughter with aplomb without raising an eyebrow...but alas....she was his love interest.....that too very naughty one !

No point in doing post-mortem...
I mean to say that nearly 60 boys/girls of various ages have read my last blog since it was published 02 weeks ago but very few took pains to post a comment...my fault .....I am unable to wake you up from deep slumber.Net surfing is not your hobby ..it is an addiction ..you see everything but does not have an opinion about happenings around you...more or less like UPA II government.

 Some one is stealing your shorts but you are unable to stop him...you graciously think that it won't make you buck naked because you still have some more layers of fabric to protect your assets............but my dear friend nudity is a relative concept....if you are at a swimming pool ...your swimming shorts provides you excellent cover...but if you flaunt the same attire in a corporate meeting..you are liable to be declared insane.So, try to protect your rightful inheritence...i.e. a pair of Bumchum shorts.

Now  coming back to my last blog .....

I gave hints that the story was incomplete...but now in hindsight I think that was a complete story...it was not like Harry Potter series where I need to keep inventing frogs to keep you entertained. So, I wont' dwell upon earlier frogs...they were hero of an earlier era..meant for your intellectual digestion.

Just one more anecdote I will add.......since the publication of my earlier story I saw one of my colleagues who tried to catch a frog using bare hand and succeeded in catching it. I appreciated the daredevilry and tried to emulate the feat. I did it...it was scary..but loved the adventure. Now I catch frogs and throw them out in my kitchen garden near the roots of Papaya tree.Sometimes, flying frogs scare me as they jump very fast and get glued to my upper body....but I have turned out to be a decent frog-catcher.Sometimes, they urinate due to fear factor on my palm but Dettol Hand wash was invented for this purpose only.

I have developed a bad habit of not coming to the topic straightaway as you might have noticed by now..because again the frogs are hogging the limelight instead of bikes....bicycles I mean.

But ..according to my theory..journey must be more enjoyable than the destination .....common sense is not very common among my generation...as some one has rightly said that common sense must be declared a super power because it is so rare.

So the story begins now....

Few weeks back I learnt a very valuable lesson. A 56-year old gentleman displayed his fitness regimen to me.He rode a bike for nearly 50 Kms. on a bright sunny morning on a hilly road and with such a superb speed that amazed me. You do not see such people regularly in your neighbourhood. They are simply genius to say the least.

I knew this fact that cross training is the best way to train and sculpt human body. Milind Soman does it regularly and he is one of the fittest model ever to walk the ramp in Indian subcontinent. Some of you must be familiar with Tuffs advertisement with snakes wrapped around Madhu Sapre and Milind. What an iconic ad that was ! It was a trailblazer and  may be termed as  one of the best of all-time aesthetically speaking.Snakes and female body in addition to Greek-god like sculpted Miliand was a very potent cocktail.

By cross training ....I mean.....running ...swimming ....and biking. First two are my favourite pastimes but biking was  never in my radar before this episode.

So, I decided to have fun with my Hero....Asia largest-selling bicycle brand pioneered by iconic Munjal family long before Splendour was invented.

First day on a cloudy Saturday, I woke up around 0500 hrs. and inspected my bike lying below staircase of my building. I decided to test the strength of  rectangular iron-frame designed by Hero factory engineers in Ludhiana. I put my 80 Kg. frame and moved up and down heavily on a very tiny seat. It withstood the first shock...decided to ride it few metres ...it moved easily..but I noticed front tyres touching the rim.....lack of  breathing air for tyres.....somehow I found out a gas enhancing machine and filled the tyre to the brim.

 But still, seat was not comfortable...why do bike makers put such a tiny seat ..they are sadistic people..they want to hurt riders at the most vulnerable spot......I realized this fact after the riding session was over on the first day .......My posterior was burning  along the edges and I decided not to use chair or sofa for that particular day due to obvious reasons as not to hurt one of the most prized possessions provided to human beings by the almighty god.

Thank god for such a soft,fluffy and sweet spongy gift  to human species.

So, satisfied with my preparatory inspection, I fasten my  Nike shoe laces tightly so as to withstand the impact of heavy and rigorous pedalling.I always notice how Roger Federer ties his laces just before embarking on a Grand Slam mission.So, this tightening of laces gives me extra motivation to accomplish the task in hand. Before running long distances, I always make it a point to do the ritual.

 I rode my Hero and took wings to explore the countryside in and around Mundali. Fresh breeze was touching the raw nerves  near my nostrils. Riding a bike is a greatly different experience from running....here you sped away at your own pace limit set by horse sitting within you.....your perspective changes rapidly..the speed of bicycle is far greater than running on foot as well as far lesser than riding a motor bike...so you get a fantastic in-between view.... you can grasp sights easily at a leisurely pace which can not be done so minutely if you are riding a motor bike as the view changes very rapidly.

Early morning village folks were doing their morning ritual in paddy fields happily savouring the aroma of young paddy saplings.This habit of us Indians can not go away, we love to shit in open air no matter who is watching from what angle. The Nirmal Bharat programme endorsed by  sultry siren Vidya Balan can not be successful unless these village fellows learn the art of shitting surrounded  by walls and roof overhead.

So, the view was not hygienic but then my bike moved alongside Mahandi river and it was a sight to behold .....a mighty river flowing in the same direction as me and trying to outpace me.....I increased my speed but still water was moving faster than me.......after nearly 15 minutes of heavy pedalling I realized that stream is unbeatable in her own path......do not act foolish and try to tame the river.... I   do not have such a long hair as to capture Ganga-like river in junglee hair(Jata) as Bhole baba had done with Bhagirathi river in bygone era.

I just flowed with the water and the nearby hills and neem trees  started talking to me. Oh my god, I never knew that I can understand the language of nature but I realized they were welcoming me in their lap and trying to communicate with me in whispers.

But, cows and bulls covering the road were not so welcoming. They tried to threaten me sometimes and were a lazy lot ...despite the twinkling of bells..they were unwilling to make way for me .....but  I persisted and took sudden twists and turns to bypass them.

On that day I rode nearly 08 Kms. It was sheer fun.

Next week ...the distance increased to nearly 14 Kms..........next time .....18 Kms.......then   22 Kms. and last saturday i.e.  yesterday it was nearly 27 Kms......So, the first five trips have been an inspiring story.

In Tour de France ,the ultimate biking competition, riders traverse a distance of nearly 3200 Kms. in 21 days with 02 Sundays in between as rest days........can you believe it that means nearly 152.380 Kms. per day ......and riders does this  between sunrise to sunset.....this must be rated as the most physically demanding athletic competition.... I can  vouch for this fact as no gas is left in me just after 27 Kms.......but my target is 50 Kms. someday and then who knows.....sky is the limit.

 Yesterday it took me nearly 02 hours on a somewhat hilly track...mostly flat but with 03 or 04 steep ingradients.These small hills are a nuisance while going up.....I had to stand on pedals putting all my body weight on handles....while my legs starts felling heavy just near the top most point...........but the going down is thrilling ..even without pedalling you are flying in the air ...just remember to use brakes judiciously so as not to hurt yourself if you face a motorist or some naughty animals bent upon ruining your day. Fortunately, I didn't encountered anything like that.

But, future bikers need to take precautions.

When I reach half-the distance...or the point from where I need to turn back.....I do a very tiny session of free hand exercises...few stretchings......few push-ups and sit-ups ..just to release the tension accumulated in upper body. Now you must be wondering about my calculation of distance in exact Kilometres....actually milestone guide me and I make it a point to touch the last  milestone in my journey so as to leave my footprints as well as fingerprints on that piece of human history.

 Yes, few centuries down the line when everything will be buried and a new civilization will take roots..archaeologist will  dig up the ruins of Mundali and find out the very milestones I am touching now. So, that will be my contribution to human history  if they have  the technology to sense my fingers on the milestone.

When riding 22 Kms. during the earlier week...I became thirsty after nearly 10 Kms.....though the water of Mahandi was readily available but I decided not to drink it because of the shit released in it by those village fellows.

Suddenly, I saw a small bamboo structure made for playing cards by village folks on the roadside. It was empty but a 2-litre bottle of Sprite filled with potable water was lying unattended. I stopped, paused and did a reconnaissance of the area.......only the verdant hills ,bushes and Kaju trees were in my vicinity.....not a single soul was in the sight....only my was  heart was beating in and around that area...no trace of any living thing besides me.

But, my soul was not permitting me to steal few drops  of water from that bottle. The white dog and black dog within my soul started fighting. I waited for few minutes in confusion but the black dog within me prevailed and I took few sips .....oh....it was good.....water was sweet......it satisfied the inner core of my heart and gave me immense joy.

So, yesterday I decided to carry my water bottle and prepared accordingly but after travelling nearly 15 Kms. I noticed that my water bottle was missing ..in fact I didn't carried it.......

But the hope is a great motivator...I remembered the exact spot where I had found the elixir last time.....I reached there and bingo the same bottle was lying unattended but this time it was only half-filled.....but 02 old  AVON bicycles were guarding it religiously.My young HERO gave them a threatening mean look and those 02 fellows panicked ......these 02 AVON bicycles gave a smart salute to their younger and fitter sibling........ my cycle became happy.

02 bicycles meant that 02 human beings were in vicinity because monkeys in Mundali have not learnt the art of bike-riding.

I waited for someone to show up..so that to ask for permission. But no one turned up....again the black dog within me won and I took large sips...same water...same feeling.

I sincerely hope that  the owner of Sprite bottle won't read this blog and my conscience is clear.....I used a free natural source when needed and I do not intend to consider it as a theft. Water is not Coal so news channels can not accuse me of any wrong-doing.

So, that was it about my biking in Mundali........I hope to continue the blog series till the time you have the patience to read such a lengthy story ............

You provide me food for thoughts....your blessings are my reward.....

Happy reading..enjoy the week ahead..till the time I decide to write again...........